Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Yellow again but easier to read and in parts Part 1

He wasn’t sure what day it was when he realized he fell in love with her. Maybe it was the day he first saw her standing there. Waiting for the subway like everyone else on the platform, her back was to him. But she was different. The air around her seemed lonely and yet beautiful. Her dirty blond hair hung freely down her back and ended just above her waist. It might have been the first time he’d seen her eyes. They were dark brown; so dark they were almost black. She had sent him a curious glance as she walked by him once. Then there was the first day she smiled at him. It had been such a sad smile. A pitiful smile. To this day he was still trying to figure out why she’d given him that smile. Then there was the day he figured out that she wore something yellow. Every day. Well, at least each day he saw her. It could be something small like her hair tie or her fingernail polish. His favorite was her yellow sweater. She liked to wear it under her black and white plaid coat with long black slacks that hung off her waist. A silver necklace with large beads and usually a black fedora hat were her accessories to the outfit.

He leaned against the wall strumming the cords of his guitar. Looking for something yellow. It had quickly become his favorite color. The sound of coins jingling against each other brought him out of his search. He smiled and nodded thanks at the man in a suit talking on a cell phone who had just thrown some change into his empty guitar case. His calloused fingers seemed to have a mind of their own as they continued to make music, entertaining the small crowd that surrounded him while they waited for their train to arrive. Then he caught a glimpse of yellow and missed a note. He had to force himself to concentrate on his song. When he finished, he looked for her but couldn’t find her. He sighed and gathered his tips. Then put his guitar in the newly emptied case latched it up and left the gloomy underground to the crowded streets of the city.

The rain hit the window as he laid in bed. He watched as the water gathered and slowly trailed down the glass. A streetlight out side cast a yellow rectangle against his wall, illuminated it. He thought about the woman. He felt his spirit descend into despair. He wanted to speak with her, to make some connection outside of his dreams. Yet every time he saw her he never worked up the courage.
As he told himself many times before, he repeated to the four walls in his small room.

“I’ll talk to her the next time I see her.”

He just didn’t expect to see her so soon. She was sitting at a table in his favorite coffee shop. A baby doll dress hung gently off her shoulders as a few strands of hair dangled in her face. She didn’t notice the strands though she was too engrossed in the book propped open in front of her. Her tights were yellow today. This was the first time he’d seen her out of the subway. He froze in the doorway when he saw her. He stood there gaping at her across the busy café until he was shoved from the doorway. He turned around and shot a hostile glare to Erik, his roommate.

“What’s your problem?” Erik asked irritated as usual.

“Nothing.” Andy muttered under his breath.

They waited in line. Andy kept glancing over at the table where the girl sat. She looked up suddenly and smiled. Andy quickly shifted his gaze, not wanting to be caught staring. Erik shot him a glance.

“What’s wrong with you today?”

Andy looked back at the girl who was now accepting a cup from a tall dark haired man. Andy frowned at the man’s back as he sat down across from the girl of his dreams.

“Nothing is wrong with me.”

He could tell Erik didn’t believe him but one of the best things about Erik was that he left things alone. Andy wasn’t sure if that was because Erik was uncomfortable with emotional situations or if Erik just didn’t care about what happened to anyone else beside himself. They found a small table after they got their drinks. Andy had to glance over his shoulder to see her. She was constantly smiling.

“Why don’t you go talk to her?” Erik asked uncharacteristically before sipping his coffee.

“Well, I think she’s on a date and I don’t want to come off as a creeper.” Andy slowly rotated his cup watching the liquid inside sway with the cup.

“I hate to break to you but you kind of are a creeper.”

Andy looked up at Erik waiting for him to creak into a smile and tell him he was joking. It didn’t happen.

“Oh my god. I am a creeper, aren’t I?” Andy said as he wound his fingers through his hair and stared at his latte dejectedly.

“Just don’t go into the stalker phase.”

“You’re so encouraging. Thanks.” Andy said sarcastically.

Erik shrugged and continued to drain his coffee. “You could stop just mentally
serenading her and actually work up the courage to speak to her.”

Andy sighed and took a sip of his latte. It was barley lukewarm. Uncontrollably his eyes wondered their way through the line of customers to the table. Through the crack in the bodies he could see them. The dark haired man made a movement. Checking a watch? His telephone. Andy wasn’t sure. It didn’t matter, whatever it was made him start to pack up and go. Andy smiled as the man got up. He gave a wave to the girl and left. Andy could help but smile more. A wave, only a wave. No kiss on the cheek or even a hug. Just a wave. Maybe they were only friends, or were related.

“Just go. Make a fool of yourself and then, I don’t know. We’ll go get smashed or
something.” Erik said as he got up.

“Hey wait, where are you going?”

“Home. I’ll see you there. Later.” Erik said lazily and left the shop.

Andy watched as his friend disappeared down the sidewalk. He had two choices, leave the store and wallow in self-pitying shame or walk over and talk to her. Probably get reject, wallow in self-pity, but finally keep that promise he made to himself. Andy got up from the table and walked to the table where the girl sat alone now. She looked up from her cup of coffee right at him.

Dear god he was actually going to do.

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